The Grays

Today I met with the Moms Group through Beaumont Hospital for the first time.  We meet every other Monday from 10-12 at a different moms’ house each week.  There are 13 of us in the group, two of which are group leaders.  I was a little worried about the timing of our meeting because Lilly is always asleep at that time, but I woke her up early from her nap and she did great – really seemed to enjoy seeing the other babies.  At one point she was standing up (with a little help from mom, of course) talking to the babies next to her.  The other moms remarked at how calm she was.

All of the babies in the group are between 3 and 5 months.  We talked about our babies and told our birth stories.  None of us could believe that more than half of the moms in our group had c-sections…crazy.

The group seems to be a lot of fun and I’m already looking forward to the next meeting!

Yesterday grandma and I took Lillian for her first Gymboree class.  She LOVED watching the other babies and playing with us.  There were three other babies who were all a bit older.  It is tough to get her to a scheduled class right now because her nap times are changing, but I hope to take her to open gym once a week and am trying Kindermusik with her next week.  She always seems to do really well in scenarios where there is a lot of stimulation, but of course she starts crying and throws a fit once she is back in her car seat and alone with mom again.

Looking forward to getting out with her more!

Scheduling.  Okay, so here’s the thing.  I think I would be better off if I didn’t read a single book about infants.  Seriously.  I am a true perfectionist when it comes to certain things so when I read in a book what a typical newborn ‘schedule’ is like, I feel badly when this doesn’t happen.  Can’t help myself.  For several weeks I worked to get Lilly on a predictable schedule, but every day continues to be different and I am ‘okay’ with that now.  She is, after all, A BABY!!!  We do have our routine down – here is what it looks like (more or less):

• wake up between 6:30 & 7:30, eat
• tummy time & play time, mommy and baby yoga
• nap time (mom showers quickly), eat
• dancing with mommy, bumbo baby sitter, reading
• nap time, eat
• run errands or long walk with mommy, sleep on and off in car, eat
• tummy time & play time
• nap or play while mom watches Oprah  :), eat
• walk
• sleep in swing while mom eats dinner, eat
• 7:45 – bath time, eat
• 8:30 – sleep (eat 2x during the night)

Nap time is different every day.  Sometimes she naps for 30 minutes and sometimes 2 hours.  She is definitely more predictable than she was earlier and I expect she will fall into an even more established routine over the next several weeks/months.  She certainly keeps me on my toes!

What’s so difficult about having a baby, anyway?  If you ask most people or read about it in a book, it is sleep deprivation.  Well, this has not been my experience.  Fortunately I was not working two months previous to Lilly’s birth, so if there’s any truth to banking hours of sleep I was off to a good start.  Most days we got 10+ hours of sleep.  Once Lilly’s birthday approached we knew these ’10-hours of sleep’ days would likely never (and I do mean never) return.

The first week with Lilly was indeed tough because she, like most newborns, was up most of the night.  Since I was recovering from surgery, Bill was her primary caretaker.  He would bring her to me when she was hungry and comfort her the rest of the time.  When we returned home we spent most of our energy that first week trying to get her to ‘sleep’ at night, and were successful.

Since then the ‘lack of sleep’ has not been much of an issue for me.  It’s definitely important to nap when you can during the first month, but never did I feel too exhausted to care for the baby or carry on with day-to-day tasks.  Instead, I have found feeding and lack of time to be most difficult.

I have written about feeding problems previously (see ‘Battle of the Breast’ below), and they continue to persist.  Nothing worrisome, as Lilly continues to gain weight and move up on the growth chart, but anywhere from three times a week to three times a day she can be extremely fussy when eating.  I never know if she is going to drink half an ounce or six ounces and have had to limit the amount of time spent breastfeeding and pump instead.

Time.  So you have a baby who needs your full attention almost the entire time she is awake.  But she naps 12-14 hours a day, right?  Right, but somehow during those 12-14 hours I still feel lucky if I have found time to take a shower.  Taking her anywhere takes twice as long as it used to and so much needs to happen during the day, from laundry, to dishes, pumping, eating, ordering diapers, calling the doctor, updating the blog :), etc.  Of course I usually finish the things on my ‘to do’ list just as she is waking up from her nap, which was an adjustment at first.  When the day winds down (which for me is around 7pm), I typically have gotten in about an hour of ‘me’ time and accomplished a multitude of tasks, feeling every day exhausted but like I truly accomplished something wonderful.